When our son, Adam, was little, we had five young boys over to spend the night at our house to celebrate his November birthday. The morning after the party, one of the boys asked Eric, “Is that lady Adam’s step-mom?” and he pointed at me. Since Eric knew that I had overheard, he teased me a little in responding to the boy, “No, Adam doesn’t have a step-mom… yet!” But the little boy kept pushing, “How many step-moms does Adam have?” It was incomprehensible that someone 6 years old didn’t have at least one step-mom. We often associate this as a 20th century problem, and it is.
But, let’s consider the predicament of Mary and Joseph, new parents two thousand years ago. Our attention has been often been focused on Mary, a young girl who finds herself pregnant with no husband. But, according to Jewish tradition and law, it was Joseph who was really in trouble. Legally, Joseph was already regarded as Mary’s husband. But the law required a one-year waiting period before the couple could consummate their marriage. It was during this one-year-period that Mary “go herself pregnant,” as the phrase goes. The gospel tells us that the child was from the Holy Spirit, but since this hadn’t happened before, what was Joseph supposed to think? Everyone would assume that Mary had committed adultery, or more believably, that she and Joseph had broken the law and had been together before they were allowed.
Under these circumstances, Joseph had two choices. He could divorce her or he could consummate the marriage, and admit that he had broken the law. The gospel tells us that Joseph was a righteous and considerate man. He saw no choice but to divorce Mary, but he wanted to do that privately so she was not humiliated publicly. Had he followed through with this plan, no one would have blamed him. But after the angel let Joseph in on what was happening, Joseph took Mary as his wife. This explanation of Joseph’s behavior makes it clear that he is not the father of Mary’s child, he is the child’s step-father, so to speak. He had compassion on Mary, and on the child she was carrying. Compassionate Joy – not only did he make the choice to legitimize the marriage, he took the child on as his own.
And here’s the most significant thing: by keeping Mary as his wife, Joseph claimed public responsibility for her and the child. More importantly, by naming the child, Joseph acknowledged him as his own son and gave him an ancestry. Without Joseph, Jesus would have been an illegitimate child in a world hostile toward children, especially children without male parentage. Compassionate Joy.
In the scripture, the ancestry given for Jesus in the Bible is from Joseph’s side, not Mary’s. It was Joseph who legitimized Jesus as a child and as the promised Messiah from God. Without Joseph’s lineage, Jesus would not have fulfilled the heritage prescribed in the Bible for the coming Messiah. Amazing! Jesus, the Son of God, was saved by his step-father!
All Joseph was asked to do was to take Mary as his wife and to be the father of her child. That sounds simple, but it is no ordinary act. To understand why he obeyed that angel, we must speak of faith, of trust, of confidence in God’s power and goodness to accomplish miracles. Sometimes God’s miracles come in really strange packaging - who would have thought that God’s plan for the redemption of the world would hinge on a step-father? God’s miracles are found in the unpredictable - unwanted and unexplained pregnancies, step-parents, stables. God’s miracles are found in compassion… and in joy.
Just when we think we’re full of unbelievable, strange stories about Jesus’ birth, his parentage and those who came to recognize him as the Messiah, we are told another story about Joseph’s role in saving Jesus. Again, an angel appeared to Joseph (not to Mary or even to both of them) and told him to take Jesus to Egypt instead of home to Nazareth.
Joseph did this and the holy family became immigrants, foreigners, aliens, in a country with strange beliefs and practices. Although we aren’t privy to any information about Jesus’ young life in Egypt, it would be logical to believe that those years had an impact on his values. Later in life, he demonstrated great understanding and acceptance of people from other places and life circumstances. By going to Egypt, Joseph’s decisive action saved the child, Jesus, from a life-and-death situation. Because back at home, Herod killed all the children younger than two, purposefully eliminating a whole group of children just for the sake of killing one. But Joseph’s compassion saved Jesus from almost certain death.
It is through Joseph - the unlikely step-father - that Jesus received his heritage, his name, his experience, and his compassion for others. Are you the Joseph in a child’s life? Are you the one an angel might ask to give of yourself for the sake of another? Are you being asked to take responsibility for a child, not your own, who is in need of you? Could you be that child’s savior, mentor, friend, or teacher? Are you open enough to believe in the miracles God can create through the strange and unexpected?
If Joseph, a young man from Nazareth, hurt and confused by his young wife’s unexpected pregnancy, can risk his reputation and his life by taking on an infant, moving to a foreign place and offering legitimacy, who are we to say “no” to those who ask us?
The children of Riverside need teachers and mentors. Are you the Joseph who will see the need, value the children, and say “yes”?
The education committee of Riverside always needs assistance. Are you the Joseph who has faith enough to step forward and say “Yes”?
I expect that we will have new families visiting Riverside in 2024. We need people to call on our visitors, befriend our guests, mentor our prospective members. Are you the Joseph who will step out of your comfort zone and volunteer?
There are children in Wichita who need foster parents, adoptive parents, families to nurture and guide them. Are you the Joseph who will legitimize these children?
There are hungry, poor, hurting children who need assistance in our country and in the world. Are you the Joseph who will put aside personal feelings and offer them hope for the future?
Because of a man named Joseph, Jesus our Christ was not killed before he was born. Because of Joseph, Jesus was not left in the street to die like other illegitimate children. Because of Joseph, Jesus was given a birthright, a name, a family, a home. Because of Joseph, Jesus was not a victim of the government or a ward of the state.
Do you have the compassionate joy it requires to be a Joseph?